05.06.2026 Ifenna Ekezie 25897

5 tips on how to make a vacation together a success

The time has finally come for that vacation with friends, family, or your partner—and you want it to be perfect. But arguments on vacation are not uncommon. Most of the time, the causes of an argument aren’t expensive meals, the wrong accommodation, or bad weather. Rather, it’s differing expectations and a lack of communication that can lead to arguments and cause stress.  

Tips from therapist Dagmar Cassiers on how to enjoy a stress-free family vacation and what to keep in mind when planning your trip.

Vacation is the time many people look forward to all year long. Expectations are sky-high—much like at Christmas. Everything is supposed to be perfect, everyone is supposed to be happy, and the problems of everyday life are supposed to suddenly disappear. Especially when it’s THAT long-awaited annual vacation. But the “most wonderful time of the year” has already put more than a few relationships and friendships to the test—or even ended them.

 1. Assess your expectations: What do I expect from this vacation?

The expectation of a perfect vacation together can quickly lead to disappointment. Because, let’s be honest, the idea that everything will run like clockwork on vacation and that everyone will be happy and in a good mood at all times is a lovely fantasy that we’re only too happy to let ourselves believe in when it comes to that long-awaited vacation.  

Just like in everyday life, plans can quickly go awry on vacation, which can put a damper on things. That’s perfectly normal and doesn’t mean your vacation is ruined. It really comes down to how we handle it: it all starts with our expectations.   

Tip: Lower your expectations

Don’t expect too much from your vacation together—just embrace the adventure of traveling, with whatever may come. Anticipation is half the fun! 

 2. Discuss your ideas: What do you want your vacation to be like? 

The stress can start as early as the vacation planning stage, when different ideas and needs clash:

That is why it is especially important to discuss in advance how everyone envisions spending their time together. When parents go on vacation with their children, it is essential to take the children’s needs into account as well.

Ask yourselves the following questions and discuss them: 

Tip: Sit down together at the table 

Everyone sits down together at the table and talksopenly about their hopes and expectations forthe vacation. That way, everyone knows what the others are expecting and what matters to them regarding the others during the upcoming vacation. This also makes planning the vacation easier.  

3. plan communication rituals

Your first vacation together as a couple? With kids? Even on vacation, it’s important to make a conscious effort to spend time together as a couple and talk to each other:

Scheduling a regular time—a “fixed meeting”—for the conversation can be helpful.

Tip: Time for two without children

Many resorts and venues offerchildcare services. This is a great way for parents to spend an hour or two together without interruptions or to take some time for themselves, while knowing their children are in good hands. 

Small gestures of love can strengthen relationships and friendships. How does it work? Read the article "Micro-mance: Small Gestures of Love Strengthen Relationships"

4. face conflicts on vacation with composure

Conflicts can arise even on vacation. It’s important to stay calm and deal with problems constructively.Instead ofhurling accusations at each other, tryto communicate your feelings and needs openly. 

One helpful method is "Nonviolent Communication" (NVC) as developed by Rosenberg:

Tip: Accommodation with a retreat

Even on vacation, you need some peace and quiet now and then. That’s why it’s worth making sure your accommodation offers enough space—including private space— so you can close the door and have some time to yourself. Some hotels, for example, offer family rooms with connecting doors. Vacation rentals or houses provide more opportunities to get some privacy.

5. see a shared vacation as a relationship test

A vacation together can also serve as a test of the relationship. When couples take a vacation together right at the start of their relationship, they may find that:

Here, too, it’s importantto clarify expectations right from the start, discuss your (vacation)needstogether, and be flexible.  

Tip: A short vacation to get to know each other

Short vacations or weekend trips together are a good way to get to know each other better and at the same time slowly get used to spending more time together.

FAQ – Frequently Asked Questions About Vacationing Together 

1. How can I avoid arguments while on vacation together? 

Open communication before and during the vacation is crucial. Clarify expectations and preferences, plan shared and individual activities, and make time for regular conversations. 

2. Why do conflicts often arise on vacation? 

Most of the time, differing expectations, unclear agreements, and unrealistic expectations are what trigger disputes. Joint planning and realistic goals help prevent conflicts. 

3. What should you do when your wishes and interests differ? 

Talk openly about what matters to each of you. Find compromises and plan activities that allow everyone to thrive—both shared experiences and time to themselves. 

4. What is the best way to handle conflicts while on vacation? 

Stay calm, avoid making accusations, be open to the other person’s needs, and use nonviolent communication. Having a quiet space in the home where you can retreat can help you gain some emotional distance. 

5. Can a vacation improve a relationship? 

A vacation together offers the chance to get to know each other better, strengthen the bonds you share, and enjoy new experiences together. Open communication and flexibility are key.