Young woman playing with two children on the floor
Parent & Child

Hosting an Au-pair : Requirements & process

Hosting an Au-pair at home means not only relief in everyday family life, but also cultural exchange at eye level.  

Michelle Mihm, Au-Pair Product Manager & Specialist Consultant for Care in Private Households at pme Familienservice, explains what requirements must be met, what the process looks like and what prospective host families should look out for when choosing an au pair. at pme Familienservice.

What does it mean to host an Au-pair in Germany? 

Hosting an Au-pair means welcoming a new family member - usually a young person who comes from a different culture and first has to get used to life in Germany.  

During the stay, the Au-pair takes onlight care and household tasks, while in return receiving accommodation, food and pocket money. For the host family, this means above all investing time, patience and openness in order to make the Au-pair 's start in a new country easier. At the same time, an Au-pair enriches everyday family life through cultural exchange and new perspectives 

"An Au-pair should be seen as a younger sister or brother who is integrated into everyday family life and with whom you grow together," says Michelle Mihm, Product Manager Au-Pair & Specialist Consultant for Care in Private Households.

Can anyone host an Au-pair ? 

In principle, anyone who meets the necessary requirements can take on an Au-pair . These include a suitable living situation, the care of a child and certain legal conditions. Anyone who meets these criteria can benefit from the many advantages that an Au-pair brings to the family.

What are the requirements for hosting an Au-pair in Germany? 

For a family to be able to host an Au-pair in Germany, a number of requirements must be met: 

  • There must be at least one child under the age of 18 in the family. 
  • The Au-pair must have their own furnished, lockable and heated room of at least 8 square meters. 
  • The colloquial language in the family should be German. 
  • At least one parent must have German citizenship. 
  • The family covers the costs of accommodation, food, pocket money and insurance as well as a subsidy for the language course. 
  • The host parents enable participation in the language course and other courses and leisure activities offered by the pme Familienservice. 
  • The Au-pair is entitled to 4 weeks paid vacation (or 2 days per month pro rata) for a 12-month stay.

How much does it cost to host an Au-pair in Germany?

If a family takes in an Au-pair in Germany, the cost of living increases accordingly. This is because there is another adult living in the household.   

The costs that families should consider when taking in an Au-pair are made up of various items: 

  • Pocket money: at least 280 euros per month 
  • Accident, health and liability insurance: around 50 euros per month 
  • German course: approx. 70 euros per month 
  • Costs for board and lodging, including during the au pair's free time or illness: around 250 to 300 euros per month 

How long can an Au-pair stay in Germany? 

An Au-pair can stay in Germany for a minimum of 4 months and a maximum of 12 months . The length of stay is agreed individually and can be adjusted according to the needs and possibilities of the family and the au pair. 

How do I find an Au-pair? 

At pme Familienservice , we place au pairs with selected families throughout Germany and support both au pairs and host families throughout their stay. We attach great importance to careful selection and continuous support from our experienced local staff. 

In addition to pme Familienservice as an Au-pair in Germany, there are also other platforms that place au pairs. 

"Many families find their Au-pair independently and then come to us for further support. We offer consultations in advance and explain what to look out for when Au-pair on your own. It is important to know that au pairs must be between 18 and 26 years old. While some platforms don't always check the age exactly, we make sure that all requirements are met." - Michelle Mihm

pme Familienservice is the leading Au-pair

pme Familienservice is one of the leading Au-pair in Germany and is an official member of the international Au-pair IAPA and the German Au-Pair. The pme Familienservice Familienservice are also certified by the Gütegemeinschaft Au-pair e.V. with the RAL quality mark. 

Challenges that families and au pairs may face

Hosting an au pair in Germany enriches everyday family life with new perspectives and cultural experiences. But it also brings challenges. 

Many au pairs who come to Germany often experience a culture shock, and language barriers can make the start a little bumpy. This phase requires a lot of patience, understanding and loving support. For the families, this means investing time in intensive training and good organization.  

This intensive initial period pays off, as the Au-pair gradually becomes a great relief and enriches everyday family life with new perspectives and experiences. 

The pme Familienservice is there to support families and au pairs throughout their stay, e.g. with tips against homesickness, assistance with language problems and help with health issues.

We look after au pairs during their entire stay! 

Our au pairs are well looked after during their stay. We offer WhatsApp groups, a Facebook group, regular meetings and a 24-hour emergency hotline just for au pairs. This means they are well connected and supported at all times. 

All information for au pairs in Germany. 

How long does it take to get an Au-pair in Germany? 

The time it takes for an au pair to arrive in Germany can vary greatly. The appointment for the visa at the embassy depends on the country of origin and can range from 8 weeks to 8 to 10 months. There are often au pairs who already have an appointment so that the decision can be made within 2 to 4 weeks. Overall, the process can take between 2 and 10 months, depending on the country of origin and the political situation.

Is the process also supported with your own au pairs? 

Yes, we also support families exclusively with the visa process. Here, too, we conduct preliminary consultations with the families who would like to look for an Au-pair on their own and then support them in the further process.

Which countries do the au pairs come from? 

Our au pairs currently come mainly from India, Madagascar, Indonesia, South America and Armenia. Countries such as Australia, America or New Zealand are hardly represented, as no visa is required for au pairs there.

Au-pair with pme Familienservice

pme Familienservice is your strong partner for safe and qualified Au-pair in Germany. With over 30 years of experience in Au-pair, pme Familienservice offers families and au pairs comprehensive information, qualified advice and reliable support throughout their stay. 

Placement is free of charge for au pairs.

zero Successful as a woman at work: the mindset is important

Two women run up the stairs one after the other
Leadership & HR

Successful as a woman at work: the mindset is important

Equal rights in the workplace? Germany is still decades away from this. But women can do a lot themselves to be more successful at work, says HR developer and coach Betty Wollgarten: for example, improve their promotion skills and clarify their relationship to power.

If we continue at the same pace as before, it will be another 30 years before the 100 largest German listed companies have as many female board members as male board members. And this despite the fact that there is no shortage of young female talent. This is the sobering conclusion reached by the Boston Consulting Group in a study

The gap between the sexes is also consistently deep when it comes to pay. On average across Germany, a woman earns 180 euros less per 1000 euros of income than a man in the same position. This gender pay gap and the unequal distribution of care work, which forces many women to work part-time, also has a negative impact on pensions.

The framework conditions for women's advancement are therefore disproportionately worse than for their male colleagues. Important starting points for improving career opportunities are, on the one hand, legal regulations regarding parenting, care and nursing duties as well as time policies. On the other hand, companies need to rethink their work culture with its conventions and stereotypes and establish more transparent selection procedures.

Self-test: How great is your development potential today?

Are you ready for the next step in your career? Our self-test for women with leadership potential shows you your strengths and development opportunities.

An important factor: How does each individual woman behave on the job?

Another relevant factor is how each individual woman behaves at work and in her private life - again and again, every day, in every situation.

With these five starting points, women can approach their advancement more successfully:

1. develop your promotion skills 

Women do not shy away from careers and promotion because they do not want to bear the responsibility or because they could not or did not want to lead. They do not lack leadership skills. Rather, they fail one step earlier: they lack promotion skills - in other words, they don't show themselves, talk about themselves and use opportunities to make their own skills visible.

Language and speaking play a major role here: speaking about yourself clearly and without embellishment is also a form of confidence. That's easier said than done: in depth, dealing with your own speech requires perseverance and courage. Who am I? What is [really] important to me? How do I express what is [really] important to me [now]? How do I set unmistakable boundaries without hurting the other person?

2. clarify your relationship to power 

The question of speaking also raises the question of power. The concept of power still triggers a diffuse feeling of unease among women. Many women shy away from the possibility of taking power for themselves or seeing it as a natural part of their career and development opportunities.

Power is something you would rather not touch. Power sounds dirty. The term alone has sinister connotations - especially against the backdrop of German history. However, it is not power that is the problem, but the abuse of power.

Women who want to rise must clarify their relationship to power. Power can be understood as potential, as the ability to do something. In physics, we speak of potential energy, which is used, for example, to drive a mill wheel - or to destroy an entire valley. This metaphor shows the proximity of shaping, creating and destroying, misusing. Bringing the creative power of power and the responsibility that goes with it to the fore brings power out of its dark back room and places it in the light of everyday action. This is a place where women also want to see themselves and make an impact.



You don't have to please everyone. But you do need to know what expectations you have of yourself.
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3. venture out of your comfort zone 

In order to have power over others or something else, in order to be able to shape things, I first have to gain power over myself. This is achieved through self-control. This means not letting myself put up with everything. For example, not believing everything I think and questioning my own beliefs (e.g. "I can't do it", "I can't do it", "I don't have enough experience yet"). It helps to jump in at the deep end from time to time, try something out and do things differently than usual. Venture out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself.

Lock your beloved self-doubts away in a safe from time to time so that they don't get lost and don't get in the way. The incessant thought that others must finally expose you as an impostor can be put outside to cool off and left out in the rain. Here and there, dare to actually attribute success to your competence and performance rather than to chance or luck.

4. choose your role yourself 

What is meant by choosing one's own role? Role expectations are constantly placed implicitly and explicitly on everyone by others. However, you can also choose your own role.

Realize that you don't have to meet every role expectation. You don't have to please everyone either. Also reflect on what expectations you have of yourself that may not be helpful. On the one hand, a role must suit me as a person, and on the other, it must serve the function that I have to fulfill. Person and function come together in the role, and performance can only be achieved through the interplay of these three factors.

As a hard-working little girl, I secure the sympathy of all team members. However, this role could stand in the way of my next promotion. When I lead my team as a fully caring mother figure, I feel comfortable in a bath of harmony. However, I won't score any points with the rival head of department.

5. build networks 

To manage all this, you need allies and supporters in a professional network. Networks that use female leadership and innovation to help break the so-called Thomas cycle, i.e. the phenomenon that describes how management levels are repeatedly recruited according to similarity (management levels usually remain very homogeneous in terms of gender, age, origin and education). Breaking this cycle requires the courage to try things out, information, contacts and continuous learning. Not only informal networks help here, but also professional ones such as the Fund Women in the financial sector or Team Nushu in business. Supported in this way, it can even be fun to get out of your comfort zone and jump in at the deep end.