Understanding baby sleep: How much sleep does my baby need?
Nights with a newborn can be a big challenge. But the baby's sleep rhythm also determines the daily routine during the day. It is helpful for parents to familiarize themselves with the sleeping habits of children in the first few months of life.
By: Bianca Kaya, teacher and certified sleep consultant
Table of contents
How much sleep does my baby need?
One topic that concerns many new parents is baby sleep. However, babies' sleep needs are as individual as their personalities. Every baby has different characteristics from birth, which can also affect their sleep. Some babies tend to fall asleep more easily, while others may need more supervision.
It is important to emphasize that baby sleep by months of life is only a rough model, as each baby has their own pace and preferences. Therefore, it is crucial to understand and respect the subtleties of individual sleep behavior while developing supportive routines to create a healthy sleep environment.
1.1 Baby sleep 0 to 3 months
In the first three months after birth, sleep is completely random. Grounding is at the center of this time. The newborn experiences gravity for the very first time, perceives new smells and sounds, feels touch, perceives darkness, light, cold and warmth.
It is not for nothing that colic occurs during this time. Parents need to be very careful here. Evening crying and screaming are not necessarily signs of abdominal pain, because if this were the case, they would not only occur in the evening. Rather, it is often the processing of the stimuli that the baby has absorbed during the day and now has to process.
If you have the opportunity, create a quiet, darkened room. Block out other stimuli by playing white or pink noise. White and pink noise are sounds that are similar to the sounds babies hear in the womb. Both types of noise can be used to help babies fall asleep by creating a familiar and soothing acoustic environment. There are sound machines that can be controlled via an app.
Breastfeeding or bottle feeding also calms the newborn and enables it to co-regulate itself with the mother by sucking. Mothers who breastfeed need have no concerns about breastfeeding to sleep. Your child will not be spoiled. Some babies like to be rocked. The imitation of gentle rocking movements reminds the baby of the mother's womb and soothes him.
1.2 Baby sleep 4 to 6 months
During this time, sleep becomes a little more restless as the first teeth announce themselves and seek their way to the surface. Suddenly shooting pain is not unusual.
Don't be alarmed if your baby lets out a loud, shrill cry out of nowhere. Dreams also become more turbulent as they go hand in hand with heightened awareness. New impressions are now perceived more clearly and consciously and processed during night-time sleep.
Your baby also makes its first gross motor progress during this time. By the 6th month, the first teeth may already be peeking out and your baby will be able to lie on its stomach independently, which suddenly makes the world look completely different. Growth is progressing rapidly. It is hardly worth buying the current clothing size, as your baby will rarely be able to wear it for longer than 4 weeks.
You may also be starting to introduce complementary foods, which will stimulate your child's digestion of new foods that their intestines need to get used to. These changes in digestion can also become noticeable at night and affect your baby's sleep.
In the evening, make sure your baby eats light food, such as an evening porridge made from processed cereals with fruit and almond paste. You can now also introduce a ritual to help you fall asleep.
Make the sleeping area cozy, perhaps with a soft play of light and background music. Carrying your baby for a little longer before lying down can also introduce the approaching bedtime.
1.3 Baby sleep 6 to 9 months
The baby's motor skills continue to develop and it takes about four naps a day.
Turning onto the tummy, sitting and crawling as well as the development of communication skills progress. The baby realizes for the first time that the parents can simply walk away, which makes the separation anxiety clear.
Falling asleep is more difficult because falling asleep means separating; as soon as the eyes are closed, the parent seems to have disappeared. Your baby may often want to reassure themselves that they are safe and not alone, which can lead to more frequent waking and crying (calling for you). This can be stressful, but remember that the world is a scary big place for this little person and darkness automatically signals danger for us, evolutionarily speaking.
If you use a night light, make sure it is red. Scientists have found that red light has no effect on melatonin production. This means that with white and yellow light, the sleep hormone is automatically reduced and the baby can become more alert as this light simulates daytime. When it gets light, this signals that it is time to get up.
1.4 Baby sleep 9 to 12 months
Your baby will probably be able to sleep a little longer at a time by now, as sleep cycles lengthen with age. He may even be able to pull himself up and stand upright, and from this position the world looks completely different again - there are so many new things to discover. As you can imagine, this also has an effect on sleep. But don't worry, at 16 your child will probably be sleeping more than you'd like. Separation anxiety is still present, as is teething. Daytime naps will shorten to two to three naps, and you'll find that your baby can stay awake longer.
Increasing mobility is also noticeable at night: An infant rarely stays put. It is therefore advisable to introduce a sleeping bag now at the latest. This way you can ensure that your child is always warm and that restless sleep is at least not due to freezing.
1.5 Baby sleep 12 to 18 months
Now the transition from infant to toddler begins. Does your child still need the breast or pre-nutrition at night? Don't be surprised, because your baby's brain is doing unimaginable things. Communication skills take a huge leap as the first words are learned. Maybe it's "mommy" and "daddy", but it could also be "no", depending on which was more dominant in the communication with your baby.
During this phase, your child also learns to walk and energy consumption increases immensely. If they don't eat much during the day, they will refuel at night. So don't worry if your child doesn't find the time or desire to eat during the day - there are so many more exciting things to discover than pasta and broccoli. It is advisable to maintain the provision of food at night until the age of two in order to provide your child with optimal support in coping with these processes and to supply their brain with carbohydrates, fats and proteins.
During this time, the autonomy phase becomes very apparent: the child is caught between letting go and not wanting to separate. This phase is characterized by the striving for independence and autonomy as well as the expression of willpower and independence. However, separation anxiety is still present, as are teething and the steady progression of language acquisition. During this time, sleep settles down to two naps a day.
A good evening ritual is to read a book in bed. However, your child may want to turn up the heat again. Children usually get rid of their excess energy before going to bed by wanting to run around. This is also fine. Afterwards, you can sing or hum a song that introduces bedtime, for example. This will help your child understand what happens next.
1.6 Baby sleep 18 to 24 months
And is your child already chattering in their sleep? In the course of this time, naps shrink to just one a day. Motor and cognitive skills are progressing, but night-time sleep behavior can still be very turbulent. Nightmares are now also increasingly responsible for this. Your child needs to be soothed and possibly helped back to sleep. The breast or a bottle of milk will still give him a feeling of safety and security, make it easier to fall back asleep and it is perfectly fine if he needs this. Some children can sleep through the night at this age. The definition of sleeping through the night is sleeping for at least five hours at a time without waking up.
Your child will most likely have established certain rituals that they need in order to fall asleep well. It may be that only one particular parent is allowed to accompany them to sleep, and an important cuddly toy must not be missing. If possible, try to fulfill this wish for your child. Don't forget that this is just a phase and the topic of sleep safety must continue to be reinforced.
1.7 Baby sleep 24 to 36 months
The naps have settled down to 0 to 1 time a day. You will probably notice that your child eats a lot at times or drinks a lot at night and then less or almost not at all. The body often demands more nutrients when an illness announces itself. The body is clever and provides itself with more nutrients in advance so that it loses less during this time - because as we know, a child's food intake decreases when it is ill. Shortly before an illness, your child usually sleeps much more and longer at night. This is also a clever mechanism to recharge and store energy.
Separation anxiety is still present in this year of life, but is usually much less pronounced. By the age of 36 months, your child ideally has the sleep cycles of an adult. This means that it really does sleep for more than 5 hours at a time. But if this is not the case, that's fine too. Pay attention to how often you wake up or lie awake during the night. You'll notice that it's more often than you realize. The difference is that you are not disturbing anyone, but your child is.
The sleep habits listed here by month of life are indications and guidelines, but they may be distributed quite differently in your child, be more or less pronounced or even non-existent. If you suspect that your child has sleep problems due to an unexplained illness, you should never forego a medical examination. An osteopath or physiotherapist can also examine your child for blockages or misalignments and ensure a balanced body sensation, which can have a positive effect on sleep.
Baby sleep chart: How much sleep does a baby need?
How can I tell if my baby is tired?
Your baby can use tiredness signals to tell you that it needs rest and sleep. These signs can vary from child to child. If you manage to recognize your baby's cues, you can react in time and offer him the support he needs to rest and recover.
Fatigue signals can be:
- Yawn
- Rubbing the eyes
- Changed behavior: A tired baby can become restless, whiny or irritable.
- Slower movements, especially in hand-eye-mouth coordination.
- The gaze is delayed and does not follow fluently.
- Reduced interest in his surroundings.
If you notice one or more of these signs, it's time to prepare your baby for a nap or sleep. Pay attention to these signs to help your baby get enough rest and sleep, which is crucial for their development and well-being.
Sleep training or attachment-oriented sleep support?
What is sleep training?
The aim of sleep training is to teach the baby to fall asleep independently and sleep through the night without being constantly dependent on the parents' help. Methods such as "controlled crying" or "gradual distancing" are used.
What is sleep support?
In sleep support, the focus is on acting in an attachment- and needs-oriented manner. This means that measures are taken that do not impair the parent-child bond and do not distance the child from their caregivers.
pme parenting consultant Bianca Kaya cannot recommend sleep training. Although it may help to make the nights quieter, there is a high price to pay for this. Parents must not forget that the attachment figure represents the absolute safety level for the infant, and knowing that they are safe is essential for healthy and restful sleep, in which further developmental processes, especially in the brain, continue to take place.
Sleep training causes stress in the infant, the stress hormone cortisol is released and the infant is in a permanent state of overwhelm. Without the opportunity to co-regulate with its caregiver, it will eventually switch to resignation. What looks like a supposed success in sleep training is actually a state of acceptance that has arisen from the painful experience of being left on its own.
In contrast, bonding and needs-oriented sleep support aims to strengthen the bond between babies. Sleep support is characterized by closeness and security, in which the infant is rocked to sleep with singing and gentle movements. When he wakes up, someone will be there before he has to cry to rock him back to sleep.
How can I help my baby to sleep better?
Healthy baby sleep is crucial for your child's development and well-being. Here are some tips to create a good sleeping environment and help your baby get enough rest:
- Pay attention to the daily routine and the organization of everyday life.
- Finding the right times for daytime sleep.
- Build up sleep pressure.
- Introduce rituals when the child needs them.
- Check the sleeping environment (temperature, fresh air, night lights).
Where can I get help if my baby is sleeping badly?
There are trained sleep consultants who work throughout Germany. However, it should be noted that each of them has completed different training with different specializations. Not all training is the same; while some advocate sleep training, others reject it. Every professional and trustworthy sleep consultant also offers a free initial consultation so that both they and the parents can find out whether a meaningful collaboration is possible and whether you speak a common language in the well-being of the parents and the child.
Before a sleep consultation, it is extremely important to ensure that there are no physiological disorders . It is therefore advisable to see an osteopath or physiotherapist shortly after giving birth. These specialists will check the entire musculoskeletal system and in particular the cervical spine, which can become misaligned as a result of the birth. Pediatricians can check for possible infections affecting the respiratory tract, urinary tract or ears. If your child cries incessantly during the day and finds it difficult to sleep at night, please seek medical advice.
